Personal Presentation - Dress & Grooming

I remember my first summer of high school looking for a job. I was struggling to find anything. I came home one afternoon and, over dinner, complained that nobody would give me a shot. My dad, looking across the dinner table at me would say, "the clothes make the man". I was in my mid-teens and had no idea what he was talking about or why he was telling me that. He never expounded on his 'wisdom'. I just figured it was his passive-aggressive way of telling me he didn't like my style. I didn't care. It was 1990 and I knew I was looking great in my acid washed jeans, high top converse All Stars, black Guns & Roses tank-top, gold chain, hair below my collar, and gold stud in my left ear. Now, over thirty years later, looking back at those old pictures (which I humbly decline to show here), I understand what my dad was talking about.

I had no idea that as soon as I walked into a business with a HIRING sign in the window, I was projecting certain things about myself to hiring managers and business owners. Unbeknownst to me, they weren't qualities anyone wanted in an employee. Regardless of any societal belief that today we've risen above such premature judgements to see the value inside of others, the truth is that we still subconsciously make snap judgements about people based on their appearance. I actually was a hard worker. I was respectful of adults, I wanted to learn how to do the job, I was punctual, honest, and understood the importance of customer service. The problem was that my 'style' didn't convey these truths.  I came across like every other kid who dressed like me; a hooligan who was lazy, untrustworthy, and a liability. I appeared more interested in myself than anything to do with their business. My dress didn't say, "I understand the job I'm asking for".

However you want to label it: instincts, gut feelings, our subconscious, it is these snap judgements that have kept the human species alive and thriving over the past 300,000 years. Whether navigating the mesolithic forests thousands of years ago or the concrete canyons of a major modern metropolis this morning, it is snap judgements based on appearance that warn us of risk, danger, and harm. As hard as we try, we can't delete this coding in our DNA, nor should we. We still rely on it to stay safe and guide us in far less dangerous scenarios.  

The first time we meet someone new, we instantly analyze them, and they us. We're not just looking for risk, but for compatibility and categorization. Are they like me? Do they understand me, my role, my field? Posture, clothing, grooming, facial expression, and numerous other subconscious cues inform us of whether this person is friend or foe, whether they are white or blue collar, whether they are likely wealthy or middle-class or poor, more or less intelligent, competent or incapable, reliable, or whether they 'seem' to be what they claim to be. All of these things we decide about each other in fractions of a second, for better or worse.

Here is a fun exercise.  Below is a picture of a man you've never met.  Take a moment to look at the picture and then decide whether he is more likely to be the IT guy at some random company or whether he is more likely to be the drummer in a well known band.

If you're like most people, you probably chose IT guy.  Truth is, he could be either, and there is no real way to tell simply by looking at him, unless you recognized him. However, the visual cues in the picture likely scream IT worker to you. At a glance, your subconscious probably picked out the following cues among others: Slightly over weight. Slightly unkempt appearance with wrinkles in his shirt and pants. Running shoes on his feet. The pen in his pocket. The hair loss. The tie. The office-looking background. Maybe even the overly friendly smile on his face. He comes across like the friendly IT guy who helps you every time you forget your password. How much money do you think he earns? You probably have a idea on that too.

If you work in Sales Engineering (SE), you should understand that new customers make the same analysis of you when they first meet you (in person or, to a lesser degree, over video).  It was either the author Oscar Wilde (1880s), or actor Will Rogers (1920s), who said, "you never get a second chance to make a first impression". That hasn't changed in the hundred years since they were alive. Even after the first meeting, customers will reevaluate their analysis of you each subsequent meeting to make sure that they were correct the first time and that you truly are what you appear to be. While it's true that over time they'll get to know who you really are and your appearance will matter less and less, you may not get those future opportunities if your current presentation is off-putting, feels fake, or feels forced. 

So, how should you dress? Before we address that question, lets talk about grooming. Neither anything about your appearance, nor your aroma should be offensive or off-putting. Keep in mind that it is not your opinion on this that matters unless you're Aston Kutcher. It is the opinion of the average customer that matters. As for scent, both ends of the spectrum are bad; any body-odor at all or too much cologne, both are repulsive to Americans. For men, no one more than six inches away should be able to smell your cologne, body spray, or aftershave and nobody should ever detect your deodorant, foot powder, hair product, body powder, shampoo brand, soap choice, laundry detergent, or any other scent. This includes what you had for lunch, both on your breath or infused into your clothes, so be conscious of where you eat (Mexican restaurants, for example, which I love, are known for lingering smells in your clothes for hours). Essentially, you should always be scent neutral.

Hair should appear as though it was intentionally styled, whatever that style is. 'Woke up like this' isn't a style. For men, facial hair should be well maintained and look like it is under control, not an homage to ZZ Top. Opinions on tattoos are changing, so a tattoo here or there (depending on industry) probably won't be an issue but if you have a full sleeve, or if any of your tattoos could be considered offensive or tasteless in the least, cover them up, at least for the first couple meetings.

Your choice of clothing should be appropriate both to your industry and your role. Whatever your customers are wearing (the ones you regularly interact with), dress one degree nicer than they do, but in the same category.  Don't dress nicer than your account manager; I've seen SEs do this, it confuses customers.

I'll use technology SEs as an example of what to wear since I know them best. It is very common for IT folks (customers) to wear khaki pants, a polo shirt, and sneakers at work. If this is who you spend most of your time with, you should look like them, but just a little nicer. They likely look up to you as an expert in your shared field, you clothing should reflect that expectation. Also, don't over do it or they'll think that you consider yourself better than them or that you're over charging them. In both cases you'll weaken the trust relationship. It is a fine line to walk.

In a scenario where you're meeting with khaki and polo clad IT warriors, you might consider technical pants, which are a cross between khakis and dress slacks but are more comfortable and made of synthetic stretchy fabrics. For a shirt, a polo is acceptable as long as it is a known name brand, appears almost brand new and is in good repair.  Alternatively you could go with a long sleeve button-up shirt (not white) with the sleeves rolled up. This says 'I'm professional, but I get my hands dirty'. Your shoes should be leather, conservative, and casual; no tennis shoes. For day-to-day meetings you don't need a jacket, sport coat, or tie as long as your customers aren't wearing them. If they are, then you are too.  If your shirt is tucked in then a belt that matches your shoes is a must. Socks should be a conservative neutral color that don't draw attention to themselves. If you like watches, a nice watch (not a Rolex) can finish off the outfit. If your watch looks like it has spent more time outdoors than your dog has, get a new one for customer visits.  This example outfit says, "I'm professional, I know what I'm doing, I'm good at it, I'm successful at it, and you can trust me to do a good job."

While on the topic of what to wear, keep in mind that all these clothing choices should fit you properly.  Find a good seamstress to do fittings and alterations. Rarely are off-the-rack clothes going to fit you perfectly. Pant legs should not bunch up on top of your shoes, nor should they drag the ground as you walk. Your shirt shouldn't balloon out around your mid-section. These make you look messy and suggest that you don't pay attention to detail, which could hurt your credibility. There are too many tips for me to go into detail here on clothing fitting, color combinations, material choices, weather appropriate selections, etc.  Check out The Art of Manliness blog if you feel like you need to learn more on this topic.

The lessons here extend to all aspects of your interactions with customers. It is all about how you present yourself and what it says to your customers. For example, if customers can see you drive up to their building, don't arrive in a Porsche 911, unless you're selling to a Porsche dealership. They'll think you make too much money and will subconsciously wonder if you're over charging them. There's nothing wrong with owning a 911, just don't drive it to work. Also don't arrive in a 1992 Honda Odyssey mini-van with bubbled window tint and two hubcaps missing, unless you have no other choice. They'll wonder why you can't afford better and subconsciously wonder if you're not very good at your job and perhaps they shouldn't trust you. 

It may not be in your nature to think about these things. Too to many of us with engineering backgrounds it doesn't come naturally, however, it is important to become good at if you're goal is to be among the best SEs in your industry.  Use the skills that got you to this point in your career to think about style, grooming, clothing, and perception. Study it out and become an expert on it. And remember, the clothes make the man.